Friday, February 17, 2006

For grown-ups who just want to be held, a new kind of sex party:

Some of the rules are obvious, like “no sex” and “pajamas stay on the whole time.” Others are not so obvious, like “you must ask permission and receive a verbal yes before you touch anyone” a la Antioch College in the ‘90s. And then there is the ridiculously funny “NO DRY HUMPING!” as if we’re a bunch of dogs running wild in the dog park on a Sunday afternoon.

My skepticism melted into a respect for the necessary structure of a situation in which strangers have the freedom to touch each other. The silliness also helps put people at ease. Although there were a few veteran cuddlers, most of us were FTC’s (first-time cuddlers). Our backgrounds were as diverse as our reasons for being there. There was an Indian grad student, a woman from Zimbabwe, a Ukrainian woman, a couple of musicians, a few writers and a flight attendant. Some people had professional incentives (their work was somehow relevant). Most of us had heard of Cuddle Party through a friend and were curious. Although nobody said so, I’m sure some of the single people were hoping to meet someone with whom they could cuddle on a regular basis. One woman said she was feeling a loss of touch in her life.